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*   Tell the child clearly what the good behaviour is you want to see.


*   Only attempt to deal with one or two problem behaviours at a time and donít expect miracles; expect to move forward n small steps.


*   Try to notice any good behaviours, even small ones.


*   Choose small rewards and give rewards each day, normally immediately following good behaviour


*   Get your child to help you choose the rewards.


*   Give rewards only after the desired behaviour has been achieved.


*   Reward ordinary, everyday achievements.


*   Explain clearly why rewards are given.


*   Have a variety of different rewards on offer.


*   Let your child know that you have confidence he or she will behave well and achieve the rewards




Crayons, paper, pencils, colouring books.

Surprise small bag with marbles, rubbers etc.

small toy e.g. car.

Hire a childís video of childís choice.

Special treat in lunch box.

Clothing for doll or added section for toy.

Choosing breakfast cereal.

Special snack after nursery/school.

Visit 50p shop.


Choosing pudding for the family.

Using telephone.

Dressing up in parentís clothes

Having a friend for tea, or overnight.

Choice of TV programmes.

Making playdough.

Making cake with parent.

Growing seeds.


Staying with friends or family.

Trip to park.

Going to the pictures.

Riding bike in safe area.

Ride on escalator 3 to 4 times.

Visit zoo, Leigh Park Gardens, Sealife Centre.

Go swimming.

Feed ducks.

Going to the beach, making sandcastles.


Making biscuits.

Extra bedtime story.

Help plan the dayís activities.

Doing puzzle / craft activities.

Extra playtime with parent.

Watching favourite TV programme with parents.





*   Praise your child when he or she is being good, donít wait for perfect behaviour.


*   Praising is not going to spoil a child.


*   Difficult children need more frequent praise.


*   Tell your child very clearly why you are praising.


*   Vary the words you use.


*   Praise should only follow good behaviour.


*   Be enthusiastic and give good eye contact when you praise.


*   Give praise immediately after good behaviour.


*   When praising a young child, give cuddles, pats and kisses etc.


*   Praise children in front of adults and other children.


100 Ways To Say ĎWell Doneí

Thatís super

Spot on

I like it

Super stuff

Really great

What a good try


Clever (boy/girl)

Iím impressed

What a brainwave

You do work well

Very imaginative

Nice try

Thatís good work


Well remembered

Good logic

Excellent work

Good thinking

Youíre a star

You are doing well

Great try

Quick thinking

Well done

Well figured out

I like that


You are doing great

Youíve done really well

Keep on trying

You show real promise

You have great ideas

Youíve mastered it

Well thought out

Youíve fitted a lot in

How imaginative you are

Good problem solving

What a perfect example

Well worked through

Iím very proud of you

Iím proud of your work

You are really tuned into work today

Itís a pleasure to see you work like that.

One more attempt and youíll be there

Youíre work is improving

You are a pleasure to teach

Beautiful job

Thatís good thinking

A very good try

You learn quickly

Youíve got the hang of it

Youíve done better than ever

Thatís a fine attempt

Youíre a problem solver

I couldnít have done better myself

You soon mastered that

You really stuck with it

You donít give up

Youíve got that down to a fine art


The above handouts have been developed from the work of Carolyn Webster-Stratton particularly: The Incredible Years: A Trouble-Shooting Guide For Parents Of Children Aged 3-8 Years. Umbrella Press, Seattle (1992).



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Last modified: 05/10/10